Things I love: What to read, watch, buy + enjoy this week
While I'm offline(ish), there's plenty to read besides me.
I am staring at the piles of bins and laundry bags, soft-side trunks and more bins that fill our entryway. My daughter’s entire life—or at least the objects that represent it—laid out before us, as she spends her final day at home before college.
So I apologize for not posting more frequently these past couple of weeks. As you can imagine, there’s a lot going on.
Tomorrow: The drive to Boston.
(Inhale…2…3…Exhale..2…3…4…5…6)
While I may be posting on Instagram a bit, I’m going to call this a semi-official writing break and leave you with plenty of wonderful things I’ve enjoyed reading lately.
My Things I Love lists are generally my newsletters for paid subscribers only, but I wanted to send this one to everyone. I promise I will do extras in September to make up for a slow August.
Yes, It’s the Guns
I first wrote this article in 2015 in response to the back-to-back mass shootings in San Bernardino and Savannah. In it, I describe what we can do about the distressing rise of unnecessary gun violence, a list of organizations making impactful change, and a list of “common sense gun regulations,” most with wide bipartisan support. It’s (I hope) an optimistic approach to gun violence activism that boils down to “look for the helpers,” and “be a helper.” I have updated it nearly every year since, most recently, yesterday after the racist shooting in Jacksonville by a white supremacist. While writing it, there were two more mass shootings, one in a mall in Columbus, and one on the UNC Chapel Hill campus.
Our kids shouldn’t have to live with this. Nobody should have to live with this.
Let’s do something already. Please.
The Artivist
Speaking of activism…I love supporting children’s book authors and illustrators, and I follow lots of my favorites on Instagram because they always help me see the world in fresh ways. I’m a huge fan of the work of best-selling author/illustrator Nikkolas Smith. He’s out with a new book next week called The Artivist. It’s a richly illustrated call to children (and their parents) to look around us, name the injustices that bother us, and find something to do about them, the way the young hero of the book does through his murals.
For My Fellow Word Nerds
If like me, you start your day with Wordle or Spelling Bee or the NYT Crossword, here’s a new one to add to your list: Connections is in beta, and asks you to sort a grid of 16 seemingly unlike words into four categories. It’s harder than you might think — when you realize that say, bash, blowout, mixer, shindig, and party are all gathering words. But that’s five.
Kenergy!
I love
+ I love her new Mojo Dojo Casa House pattern in her shop. Our apartment is too small for a man cave, but I am seriously thinking about making one to hang over Jon’s desk just because it would make him laugh every day.Trapped in the Algorithm
If you liked my Substack called Make the Phone Call (and a lot of you did—thank you), you will definitely appreciate Frederick Joseph’s End of the Social in Social Media, which I can’t stop thinking about.
James Baldwin once said, “People are trapped in history, and history is trapped in them.” Today, it seems, people are trapped in algorithms, and algorithms are decidedly trapped in profit motives. The web of social media, for all its intricate designs, has wrapped itself around the very core of human interaction, morphing genuine connections into capital exchanges, and turning the vast ocean of human emotion into droplets of content.
I especially love his urging that “Opting into relationships, actively choosing the individuals and entities we want to engage with, free from the invisible hands of these platforms, is not regression but a reclaiming of agency.”
(Psst…call your friends and family. They want to hear from you!)
Just My Type
I’m a sucker for graphic design and wonderful typography, so of course I’ve been a longtime fan of Debbie Millman’s work. (And not just because she syndicates my columns in Print Mag’s Creative Voices section each month!) Turns out she has Society 6 shop, which includes this wonderful Edie Windsor quote on pillows, artwork and more. But there’s a lot there you might love if you look around.
Hey! Fascists! Leave Those Kids Alone.
In 2018, I wrote about a new book from Emmy-winning writer Jill Twiss, A Day in the Life of Marlon Bundo.(I told you I like children’s books!) In 2019 I interviewed her for my podcast. Since then we’ve become internet friends and she owes me an IRL get-together.
Also in that time, the hilariously-named extremist authoritarian activist group, Moms for Liberty, has demanded Jill’s book’s removal from Florida school libraries, in part for its depiction of “two handsome grooms-otters,” and can you believe they actually had to say those words with a straight face? Maybe they should use all that liberty they have to research the science of sexual orientation, and how it’s not actually impacted by anthropomorphic semiaquatic mammals.
Read more about The Chaos in Florida School Libraries from
Fascinating Reading: Parenting, Culture + More
The kissing scandal after Spain’s World Cup by Louisa Thomas (The New Yorker)
Two men who were switched at birth coming to terms with their new racial and cultural identities (NYT Gift Article)
One of my favorite writers/people,
, is now on Substack! Read Single Mothering Still, in which she “hopes to spare you some of the guilt.”How to discuss pain with your doctor and advocate for yourself, especially if you’re a woman and you don’t feel heard by Christina Caron (NYT Gift Article)
Steve Martin on finding out what funny is (New Yorker, 2007)
Should women CEOs be able to expense childcare? Smart op-ed from Manon DeFelice, founder/CEO of Inkwell (Inc. Magazine)
Two Black powerhouse women in media, Catherine McKenzie and Quiana Burns, offer advice on leadership, kindness, and the intersection with diversity and inclusion. (By Jessica Abo for Forbes)
“Think about the questions you have for loved ones in your life, that you might regret not having asked. Ask them now.” Solid advice from
.Like The Cure? Tears For Fears? New Order? Depeche Mode? @Postpunk_80 shares the best video clips on Instagram, and it’s always a palate cleanser when it pops into my feed.
OK FINE ONE MUGSHOT MEME
I was tryng to avoid mugshot talk but I give up. It’s unavoidable. So I’ll leave you with the mugshot meme that has made me laugh the most, courtesy my Gen Z kid.
My daughter was born on 9/10/2002. We didn't know her then, because she started her life as our foster daughter. They called us on the 12th-we have this newborn, and we know you're at capacity but everyone is devastated, and there's a tropical storm coming this week and...could you keep her until Monday, when we find a different placement? Clearly we said yes. I remember so many people came over that Thursday and Friday to see her. I was puzzled, because people always came over to meet our foster kids, but this was different. So many people. And then it dawned on me that she was good medicine that week. People needed to soak in the purity and innocence of her little newborn self. I called the placement team Monday morning and told them to leave her here. And then we were able to adopt her. She gets a lot of comments that are similar to yours about her birthday, and she feels bad, because obviously she has no memory of that day. And when she is feeling bad about that, I tell her thst her birthday and her arrival in our lives was a reminder that things were still beautiful, and we just needed to be reminded of that. So I think that it true of your 9/11 birthday too. May you always shine with that beauty.
GOSH, thanks! Truly an honor to be mentioned. I LOVE the idea of that over Jon's desk, let me know if I need to start stitching! Also, p.s. that pattern is the design of one of our clever guest contributors, Mr. Stevers. He's a keeper!