To the lady in the Instagram comment section about the shooting...
I see you. And I see your 151 likes.
It’s not sleepovers.
Do you really think it’s sleepovers that’s the problem? Because I don’t think you really believe that.
I know you’d like to think it’s sleepovers, because it’s scary out there as a parent. You can’t control a lot outside your door, but you can certainly forbid sleepovers, and bonus — it makes you feel smarter than the parents who are mourning their dead children right now. You win!
But wait. It’s not sleepovers that’s the problem. It’s not a lot of things.
It’s not malls.
It’s not movie theaters.
It’s not supermarkets.
It’s not banks.
It’s not subways.
It’s not music festivals. Or nightclubs.
It’s sure as hell not schools that are the problem.
It’s not driveways. It’s not doorbells. And it’s not doors.
Yep, there are actually people in power who are trying to convince us we need different kinds of doors to solve the problem. It’s a whole level of ignorance and deflection that’s hard to even process. At least for me it is.
Or maybe you think we need different kinds of fences between houses? Different doors, different fences, maybe different walls, roofs, windows? Sure, why not.
It’s not hospitals: my God, who would even suggest that? Surely someone has. Maybe the people who are concerned with doors.
it’s not teachers who don’t want military-style defense training to be part of their job descriptions. This is not on them.
Oh, and it’s not fatherless sons. It’s not motherless sons. It’s not single parents at all so let’s stop with that.
It’s not churches. Or mosques. Or synagogues.
And it’s not atheism either. I mean, you’d have to wonder what kind of totally insecure divinity would think terrorizing and murdering children is reasonable restitution for not receiving enough praise.
It’s not the pandemic and it’s not PTSD, both of which ladder to the new favorite scapegoat of the do-nothing faction: “mental health.” (Along with the new new favorite scapegoat, anti-depressants.)
Now logically, let’s consider the fact there are Republican officials who swear up and down that the problem is attributed to mental health and mental health alone—while at the very same time, those exact same people are voting against laws that would promote more access to mental health services.
I don’t know about you; but it makes me kind of skeptical that they really believe that treating mental health is the single most meaningful factor in preventing unnecessary gun violence and domestic terrorism.
Because…it’s not.
It’s the guns.
It’s the guns.
It’s the guns.
It’s the guns, and the people who want to kill people with guns, and every single Republican lawmaker who won’t vote for common sense gun reform, which is most of them, I’m sad to say.
Via Vox
Until we make real change, we’re going to keep waking up to the most horrendous stories each morning, then going to sleep with a different one breaking each night. It feels like it just gets closer to home each day, and it’s unbearable.
So sure, lady in the comment section, ban sleepovers. Just don’t be surprised if it doesn’t change a thing.
A note to my readers: Since I started this post four days ago, there have been even more shootings, including the horrendous murders at the Allen Texas outlet malls, at the hands of an avowed White Supremacist with access to weapons of war.
It’s a lot to process. Even writing this, finding the links, researching the data, and knowing I couldn’t possibly link to everything I’m seeing — well, I’m going to need a long walk around the block to clear my head.
I know that for so many of us, it feels hopeless. And when I start to lose hope, I take a break, step away from the news, reset and look for the helpers. Then I try to be one myself.
Please support organizations like Everytown for Gun Safety, Moms Demand Action, Giffords Courage, Brady United, and Gun Owners for Responsible Ownership.
In the memory of those who have lost their lives, you can also urge your elected US House Rep to reinstate the bipartisan assault weapons ban. Text FED UP to 644-33 and you’ll be connected.
Finally, know that if you believe that we could be making more laws to prevent this American epidemic, you are among the significant majority of Americans who have the common sense to agree with you.
Image: Jose Alonso via Unsplash
Yes, for those who want to say it's not the guns, it's the people, and go further to scapegoat people with mental illness (even though they are statistically more likely to be *victims* of violence than perpetrators): If you think the problem is the people, why do you want to give more guns to the people??? To the point that you, as you point out, not only vote against mental health measures, but vote against red flag laws, waiting periods, keeping guns out of the hands of domestic abusers, etc. etc. It doesn't make sense and never made sense, and it is simply unconscionable.
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