Maybe kids can own fewer dolls, says guy who could own fewer $100 million private jets
His Marie Antoinette Moment: Parents are not going to be happy with this one.
“Well, maybe the children will have two dolls instead of thirty dolls, you know, and maybe the two dolls will cost a couple of bucks more than they would normally,” says the guy whose four-year-old son owned tens of thousands of dollars worth of stuffed animals and ride-on toys, when he was asked about the increasing impact of his fakakte tariffs.
“I don’t think that a beautiful baby girl needs — that’s 11 years old — needs to have thirty dolls. I think they can have three dolls or four dolls” says the guy whose whose baby son (not 11 years old) rode in a golden baby carriage with a mini chandelier estimated to cost $20,000, and owned his own Louis Vuitton suitcase for playtime worth a mere $9,500.
“We don’t have to waste money on …things we don’t need, for junk that we don’t need,” says the guy whose baby had the privilege of spitting up on a designer mink coverlet that cost in the $10-$20,000 range.
Kids “don’t need to have 250 pencils. They can have five,” says the guy illegally defunding the Department of Education and Head Start, while there are dozens of public school teachers on Donors Choose, begging for pencils for their students.
Sometimes, teachers write, they are hoping to give those pencils to students as a reward. Something special that creates a joyful learning experience. Something so treasured that it teaches children to treat them with care.
Pencils.
This is just some of the nonsense he said to Kristen Welker on Meet the Press this weekend, and I hope we never ever stop calling out this hot garbage when we hear it.
To be clear, I’m all for saving money — for thinking more about what we buy and who it supports; how to support more small local businesses and US-made items; all the things we should stop tossing into landfills when they can be repaired or recycled or resold or donated; and how many streaming services or Stanley Bottles or Trader Joe tote bags one family truly needs.
I’m all for conscientious consumerism, and it’s something I advocated for at Cool Mom Picks for over 15 years.
This is not that.
”We don’t have to waste money on things we don’t need,” says the guy who cost taxpayers $26,000,000 on weekend golf retreats in the first ten weeks of this term alone; after having already cost the American people $151,500,000 for golf trips during his first term. (And those are just the golf trips.)
“You don’t need to have, as I said, 35 dolls. You can have two, three, four, and save a lot of money.”
Well maybe, my guy, you don’t need to have 87 golf course visits over 52 weeks. You can have two, three, four and save a lot of money.
You don’t need to charge us $800,000 every weekend you fly back and forth to Mar-a-Lago, which is every weekend, actually. (Maybe because it’s the only place where you know no one will say I hate you right to your face?)
You don’t need to cut taxes for billionaires.
And you certainly don’t need a North Korean-style fantasy military parade on your birthday, and for the American people to be asked to pay for it.
Because you know what we do need that money for?
Head Start.
USAID support — as a matter of public safety, national security, and old-fashioned morality.
Subsidized food for low-income seniors.
Veterans services.
Mental health care.
Public school aid.
Federal work-study funds.
College scholarship grants.
Skills training for high school grads.
Pediatric cancer research.
All kinds of medical research.
Renewable energy subsidies.
Support for family farms.
Toxic waste site cleanup.
FEMA grants.
Infrastructure repair.
Infectious disease outbreak investigations.
Consumer financial protections.
Land conservation and preservation of our National Park system.
PBS.
NPR.
Arts grants.
Public libraries.
Family leave and childcare.
Clean air.
Clean water.
Food inspections.
Civil rights protections.
Medicaid, Medicare, and the Child’s Health Insurance Program, for God’s sake.
These are all being gutted, if not outright eliminated by Mr. TARIFFS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WORD and his complicit administration — and this is hardly a complete list.
I mean, what in the name of Imelda Marcos is this deranged line of thinking? Who (besides the sociopaths behind Project 2025) is down with the idea that American citizens should make do with fewer pencils, while Dear Leader is giving his teenage son $150,000 watches and $200,000 cars, flying a $100 million private jet, and dragging the baggy trouser hems of his own $20,000 custom Brioni suits?
(Suits made in the United States of Italy, by the way. Surely tariff-exempt. For him.)
Let’s keep it in perspective.
While yes, parents are going to be raising a big middle finger at all of these ridiculous Meet the Press quotes about how we should be fine spending more on toys or just stop buying them altogether, let’s remember that this is not really about Barbie Dolls. Or buying American. Or consumption at all.
Because he also doesn’t care if we pay more for health care, housing, clothing, childcare, education, food, and medicine.
Let alone pencils.
In fact, he doesn’t care if we have any of it to begin with.
Such good writing. Thank you.
Wow! Chris and I are gobsmacked by the list you so thoughtfully presented. His mendacity, stupidly, and vengeance will return to bite him in his Tiny. I pray it happens soon.