Reading this as my grown kiddo sits at my kitchen counter eating late breakfast. Sometimes knowing that someone else can meet some of your most basic needs while you take time to just..... be..... is everything. ❤️ Hope you can get some much needed rest.
You nailed it but what you didn’t mention is that’s when your Mom is happiest too. Taking care of her favorite daughter is her greatest pleasure. I know that for sure…
Liz, for so many years, I would run to my parents' in Santa Barbara, their little home, so welcoming and full of anything I might need, mostly hugs. But also wine. And pillows. And usually sunshine. I called it watering my roots. I'd sleep for a week or two. Then I would gather my strength, gird my loins, fly back to NYC and do battle again. I miss them everyday. For so many reasons. It makes me happy you have your mom to do for you what you do for your girls. Take the sweater. Enjoy every beautiful minute.
Great piece, Liz. Similar routine for me for years: an occasional weekend getting spoiled at my parents’ place in Connecticut. What an elixir! 72 hours later, I felt ten years younger and 10% smarter. Now, it’s my turn to be that resource for my kids. This is a “job” to cherish. It is a joyful circle.
Thank you for sharing about requests as questions. It made me think on my own experience.
My husband often asks me in a Q, what he ultimately wants for himself. “Do you want to walk over on the path?” “Do you want to take the scenic route?” I used to always say yes, because I knew it is what he wanted. As an anxious people-pleaser, I forgot about me. That I had a choice. Now, I say no when I feel the no inside of me. I can see his hurt each time I do. I remind myself he asked a question, not give me an ultimatum. We’re practicing a new way forward - after 25 years of an old way. As you say so well, it all comes from a place of love and connection.
You are soooo lucky, there’s no way to really, deeply understand all the million ways until she’s not there anymore. Cherish every second, take lots of photos, videos — take a video of her telling you that everything is going to be okay. Save her voicemails. I thought I had done all that, but there’s never enough when she’s not here. Count your lucky stars. ✨
I love this and your shift in perspective. Observing how we communicate and the meaning underneath it can be life changing. Hoping you get the much needed rest and sending love
Thank you --this was just what I needed this morning. I loved every word of this reflection. It hit me in all the right places. I relate on almost every level.
I remember the “cabin just 50 yards from her back door,” where a pot of tea & hand-knitted socks wait in a basket, ready to warm passersby. And the kind, caring woman who listens & shares her wisdom. Thank you for allowing us to treasure your mom (& reminding us to treasure our own) through your stories. Wishing you the respite you need as you transition into the next season.
There are so many times when we are not ok, yet we put it "on the back burner." Embracing the not being ok now and again gives us such necessary respite that our soul, heart, mind, and body so desperately need! I know your mom personally, and in the years I have known her, her presence has always been a warm hug, validation, and love. You have a gift for writing that touches hearts deeply... don't stop! Of course... after you rest and refill your mug when necessary!
I love this so much. I don't have this relationship with my parents(it's reversed roles.) I've craved this all my life and created this for my own children. Reading your words gives me such joy! Those feelings of love are what I want my own young adult children to know and feel.
Thank you for sharing this. That’s why I do feel lucky to have this, because we don’t always get their relationships we want or deserve. But we definitely have a say and we can make our own. I love that you’ve found that path. (and I hope your own children feel lucky.) ❤️
Hi, I hope you’re OK.
Thank you. Just resting and resetting like we all need sometimes.
Indeed, we all need a bit of respite sometimes; I’m glad you recognise when.
That’s beautifully written. Now, rest and enjoy the flowers, and being taken care of. ❤️
Reading this as my grown kiddo sits at my kitchen counter eating late breakfast. Sometimes knowing that someone else can meet some of your most basic needs while you take time to just..... be..... is everything. ❤️ Hope you can get some much needed rest.
Bravo!
❤️❤️❤️
“My ex used to yell at me, “Just tell me if you want me to get the mail! Don’t ask me if I want to!”
Then, I met Jon.
He simply answers, “Sure. I’ll grab the mail on my way upstairs.”
This made me tear up a bit: such love in these few, simple sentences.
You nailed it but what you didn’t mention is that’s when your Mom is happiest too. Taking care of her favorite daughter is her greatest pleasure. I know that for sure…
Aw man ❤️ (also, I’m really hoping she doesn’t have any other daughters that I don’t know about)
Liz, for so many years, I would run to my parents' in Santa Barbara, their little home, so welcoming and full of anything I might need, mostly hugs. But also wine. And pillows. And usually sunshine. I called it watering my roots. I'd sleep for a week or two. Then I would gather my strength, gird my loins, fly back to NYC and do battle again. I miss them everyday. For so many reasons. It makes me happy you have your mom to do for you what you do for your girls. Take the sweater. Enjoy every beautiful minute.
Thank you for sharing that, Barbara. ❤️
Great piece, Liz. Similar routine for me for years: an occasional weekend getting spoiled at my parents’ place in Connecticut. What an elixir! 72 hours later, I felt ten years younger and 10% smarter. Now, it’s my turn to be that resource for my kids. This is a “job” to cherish. It is a joyful circle.
"parent it forward" -- I like the sound of that!
Thank you for sharing about requests as questions. It made me think on my own experience.
My husband often asks me in a Q, what he ultimately wants for himself. “Do you want to walk over on the path?” “Do you want to take the scenic route?” I used to always say yes, because I knew it is what he wanted. As an anxious people-pleaser, I forgot about me. That I had a choice. Now, I say no when I feel the no inside of me. I can see his hurt each time I do. I remind myself he asked a question, not give me an ultimatum. We’re practicing a new way forward - after 25 years of an old way. As you say so well, it all comes from a place of love and connection.
I don't believe in luck. I believe in manifestation. Enjoy your mom, she sounds amazing.
This was so beautifully said.
You are soooo lucky, there’s no way to really, deeply understand all the million ways until she’s not there anymore. Cherish every second, take lots of photos, videos — take a video of her telling you that everything is going to be okay. Save her voicemails. I thought I had done all that, but there’s never enough when she’s not here. Count your lucky stars. ✨
I love this and your shift in perspective. Observing how we communicate and the meaning underneath it can be life changing. Hoping you get the much needed rest and sending love
Thank you --this was just what I needed this morning. I loved every word of this reflection. It hit me in all the right places. I relate on almost every level.
I remember the “cabin just 50 yards from her back door,” where a pot of tea & hand-knitted socks wait in a basket, ready to warm passersby. And the kind, caring woman who listens & shares her wisdom. Thank you for allowing us to treasure your mom (& reminding us to treasure our own) through your stories. Wishing you the respite you need as you transition into the next season.
Lisa, Isn’t it time for a visit? I’ll be waiting..❤️Nancy
There are so many times when we are not ok, yet we put it "on the back burner." Embracing the not being ok now and again gives us such necessary respite that our soul, heart, mind, and body so desperately need! I know your mom personally, and in the years I have known her, her presence has always been a warm hug, validation, and love. You have a gift for writing that touches hearts deeply... don't stop! Of course... after you rest and refill your mug when necessary!
I love this so much. I don't have this relationship with my parents(it's reversed roles.) I've craved this all my life and created this for my own children. Reading your words gives me such joy! Those feelings of love are what I want my own young adult children to know and feel.
Thank you for sharing this. That’s why I do feel lucky to have this, because we don’t always get their relationships we want or deserve. But we definitely have a say and we can make our own. I love that you’ve found that path. (and I hope your own children feel lucky.) ❤️